Thoughts from a blackhole

Part 5: The End

“Out of the shadows; into the light,
I have a power; take back what’s mine,
We have a power,
We are alive.”
-I’m on by Nas, Cool and DJ Khaled.

Fack, fack, fack, fack.

Hallo hallo.

This is the beginning of the end.

Have you ever heard me sound this happy? Because I haven’t.

I am still writing this fucked up diary, diary. So I’m going to talk about geeky girl.

This is the last time though; I’m so sorry I have to leave you, diary. I know my depression feeds you; I know it makes you happy and gives you strength.

I can’t do it anymore and you know why; I don’t have any more depression to give to you. I am so sorry; you helped me and now I can’t help you in return.

I am sorry.

I don’t care if you’re angry; fuck you.

I’m quitting cigarettes now. It’s so fucking weird; but so is everything that’s happening now. And that’s cool. Almost everybody thinks I can’t do it; the “almost” clan used to include me. But geeky girl can make me do anything; so it’s happening bitches. It is very fucking hard though.

It’s so cool. Talking for hours and I don’t even fucking know that hours pass by. I hate talking but it just seems to come out of moi now. It is very fucking cool; one fucking good reason to wake up in the afternoon and not to sleep at night.

Everybody fucking sees me now. I used to enjoy the inconspicuous life. But it’s cool; nobody means any harm. I’m on to those fuckers that say shit about me though, and I’m coming with divine fucking fury. They know themselves; the God fucking squad. I heard some new shit today that renewed the fire of vengeance. I’m not even playing. Burn down to the fucking ground; burn them on their fucking cross.

God squad annihilation is a luxury; I already have everything I need.

Aaaaaah. Feels good. Nigga, I’m on.

This is the beginning of the end.