I swear to God this is very fucking funny. Before I begin, I have to explain this so it does not seem like I am being chauvinistic or it doesn’t seem like I am degrading women. “Sand in your vagina” was a phrase coined from South Park, by my roommates, to describe a person who, so to say, does bitchy things like keeping malice, unnecessarily hating on other people, and unnecessarily squabbling; especially keeping malice and hating. If you do these things, you have a vagina; and what’s more, you have sand in your vagina. It’s very fucking funny; I could not but use it.
Let us begin. For years now, wise ones such as my parents, have been telling me about the nature of the world; and the nature of people. My father always says “choose your friends wisely because when you are shining, people will always want to bring you down”. It is a common notion, and perhaps that is why I did not take it into consideration. I believed that no one is really that petty; no one is that jobless. I could not for the life of me imagine anyone actively seeking to bring someone else down. Isn’t this a waste of time? Don’t they have their own lives to live? Would people really sink that low?
In the words of Biggie Smalls, I was dead wrong.
I will explain this using a short story. There was a little incident involving a dude named Jacob and Jacob acted rather stupidly in this incident. This incident was witnessed by Jacob’s friends and they decided to poke fun at him; Isaac led the pack. Isaac said many things about Jacob, some of which are that he was stupid, he was still evolving, blah blah blah. Everybody laughed for a while until the jokes started hitting Jacob’s nerves and the whole incident turned into a squabble. This was no biggie. It happened on a regular; Isaac was known for taunting everybody around him and everybody turned a blind eye to his shit.
But not Jacob.
Jacob went into a frenzy and things got personal. Hurtful words were exchanged and the squabble ended; for Isaac, but not for Jacob. It is understandable that Jacob got fucking pissed off and it is understandable that he turned the whole thing into a squabble. It is understandable if Jacob decides not to speak to Isaac for a week, or a month, or a year, or forever. It is understandable if Jacob punched Isaac and took him on a rumble around the city, and it is understandable if Jacob sucker-punched Isaac at every opportunity he got. All these things are understandable and acceptable. Human beings are allowed to be angry and they are allowed to hate. What Jacob did next, I cannot comprehend and I will not accept.
Fast forward one day, and we are talking about a piece of writing that Isaac did. Everybody appraises it, criticises it, and the general consensus is that this young man is very fucking talented. Jacob gives his own opinion and says he doesn’t think Isaac’s shit was that cool. He doesn’t think Isaac’s shit is extraordinary. And he is allowed his opinion. However, as these things go, we start arguing. Everyone has their opinion and everyone is allowed to back up their shit; we did this. It got to a point in the argument where Jacob was up against the wall and he could retort no more. He then - wait for it- makes shit up just so he can discredit Isaac’s work.
I was so fucking surprised and I was so fucking pissed. There is no reason for this. There is no reason for you to want to bring someone else’s work down just because both you dudes had a little disagreement. You should have seen Jacob go. Nothing would change his mind. He was totally caught in this lie that he had told, but he still went on and on; just to bring down Isaac. Just to fucking dull his shine. There is no need for this. The only reason for revenge that I approve of is mortal danger of an individual and/or the people he/she loves; everything else is unnecessary. This is not even really revenge; it’s the survival instinct. Someone tries to fucking kill you, you fucking kill him first.
What does bringing down Isaac add to Jacob’s life? Nothing. Why then does he do this? Why then does he engage in this fucking counterproductive exercise of ridiculing someone else’s shit? Why is he so petty? Does he not see that his little vendetta is totally unnecessary? Does he not know that somewhere in Somalia, some dude is living off one dollar a day? Does he not see that there are bigger things in this world than trying to get back at somebody just because he insulted you? There is poverty in the world. There are rapists, killers and thieves out there. There is a very fucking competitive labour force to conquer. There is your creator to find. There are all these things and yet there is space in Jacob’s world to actively seek to discredit and ruin someone who has not threatened your life, the lives of your friends or your family, or your daily bread. I cannot ever fucking understand why someone would do something so fucking low. Why can’t they just let it go? There is so much more in life to live for than harbouring useless squabbles in your heart.
When you start shining, someone will want to bring you down. And why does this happen? It is simply because these people exist. It is because there are people out there whose nature it is to harbour and keep malice in their hearts. They cannot be explained. You step on some dude’s shoes on the streets when you’re 15 and when you’re 30 and successful, this same guy tries everything in his power to ruin your life. He cannot stand the sight of you being successful; just because you stepped on his fucking 70 dollar Nikes. These people cannot be explained; their actions are not rational. These are the people that my father tells me to be wary of and now I am also saying this to you.
Why do you have to be so petty? Why do have to have revenge for every single thing? Why can you not be tolerant? There are so many fucking different kinds of people in the world. If everybody acted on the fact that they didn’t like someone, the world would be sparsely populated. Why do you want to see someone go down? Can you not see that this malice is killing you also? Can you not see that there are so many other productive things that you could be doing? Why do you always have to retaliate? Why can you not just let it go?
Why is there sand in your vagina?
Insightful. Jesus said to remove the log of wood in our eyes before attempting to remove the speck of dust in other's eyes. I say, remove the sand in your vaginas and the world would be a better place :)
ReplyDeleteI don't like the 'sand in your vagina' metaphor, obviously because I do have a vagina, and I don't see why they had to use 'vagina' and not, say, penis. Why bot 'mud on your penis' or something? But it's South Park so I guess I should just be thankful it isn't worse.
ReplyDeleteThat aside, this post addresses a very serious social problem that I for one will never understand. Some people make it their business to cut other people down so they can look taller. I think that is indication of some mental health issue, because normal people tend to their own development instead of trying to stunt the growth of others around them. That sort of behaviour is an aberration and they need to get therapy so the rest of us can have some peace. I'm so sick of having to deal with shallow, petty and hateful people.
Seems to me like you are Isaac. There was a lapse in the story, where you used 'we'. That wasn't an extremely nice thing to do, and depending on how much you hurt Jacob, his actions could be partly justifiable. So, he is not entirely to blame.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I like the 'sand in your vagina' phrase. But as LIR pointed out, why a vagina? As in, really...
Anyways, nice nice. I like.
Oh, and yeah, the part where you said if everyone ..., the world would be sparsely populated is just genius.
ReplyDeletewow! this is so true. I'll have to agree with you. why do people always try hard to bring others down for absolutely no reason? but in this case, Jacob has every right to be pissed at Isaac. I mean why would Isaac be picking on Jacob in the first place? didn't he have anything better to do?
ReplyDeleteas for the phrase 'sand in your vagina', i just think its weird.
So. rudebode, are you Isaac or not? You did say that you don't hide anything on this blog, and that "it's a fucking good feeling".
ReplyDeleteSo.. are you?
Yes, Dori. If Jacob has sand in his 'vagina', what does Isaac have? Garri? Potopoto? Doesn't he have anything better to do?
ReplyDeleteOk. Alright.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I am sorry for using this metaphor. It was just very funny. You have to watch that episode. I believe it is season 5 episode 2.
Secondly, for Ms. Sandiego and O.O, I am not Isaac. As LIR rightly quoted, I promised I wouldn't hide anything about myself on this blog; i have kept true to that promise. I might be a little bit arrogant but I would not appraise myself as being "vey fucking talented". Isaac and Jacob are friends of mine whose identities I am not willing to reveal. I chose the alias Isaac because of his nature; he is wont to laugh at everything and everybody. I chose Jacob because quite frankly, Jacob was a bitch to his brother Esau in the bible and this is what my Jacob does to Isaac in this post.
Thirdly, Isaac does not have sand in his vagina. He likes to poke fun, yes; some people are just like that. He does not do it to bring anybody down. I put up with it and ten million other people put up with it, because we know that he is just fucking with us; and he is a true friend. It is annoying sometimes, yes, BUT I did say that Jacob had the right to be pissed off at Isaac. C'est natural. What he doesn't have the right to do is to keep malice and use this little squabble to try and shoot down everything that Isaac does. This is the epitome of having sand in your vagina.
Isaac does not do this. As I said, this little incident became a squabble. A squabble takes two people and I should imagine that by saying squabble, you should understand that Jacob also said some hurtful things to Isaac. However, Isaac is good and done with it when we all wake up the next morning. Why can Jacob not do this?
Because he has sand in his vagina.
Well, maybe Jacob is a bit more sensitive than all of you 'hard' guys. I totally get him. And if Isaac is a true friend, he should minimize his 'nonsense' around Jacob, or stop it completely.
ReplyDeleteHe really should get a life 'cos he has serious issues. He's just hiding behind the excuse that he likes to 'poke fun'. Who does that?
It's cool to make fun of people once in a while, but if they keep reacting negatively to it and getting hurt, then you should really stop. Unless you have some sort of sadist ish going on.