Battle of the Tits

This is a little something one of my friends wrote to describe the Oedipus complex. There are a few inside jokes but the general jokes outweigh the inside jokes. So here we go, untouched and untarnished by me. I love this.

Once upon a time in a place called Ebute-metta, there lived an aburoy couple with their grandfather Bode (holds the record for the oldest living cigarette smoker) and uncle joker Sirra. The man’s name was Laolu (man with sandy pussy), while his wife’s name was Koinsola (meaning women with big boobs). They got married and had a very happy sexual life; she gave him a lot of attention and allowed him in every time he wanted it. They enjoyed each others as they were both allowed to fulfill their sexual dreams; she liked his licking and he loved sucking boobs. That’s that about their sexual lives now to the main story.

Long period of happy married life and there came a problem, Koinsola became pregnant. At first this was very exciting; lots of preparations were done in expectation of a new aburoy member.

Nine months went past and the day for the baby to be born came. Koinsola was rushed to the hospital and after three hours in the labor room, new baby Laju (the trouble maker baby) was born. Baby Laju was a very restless boy. He slept a lot during the day and stays awake all night; uncle joker even nicknamed him black vampire. But with all these happy experiences, daddy sandy pussy started getting pissed. He wasn’t getting as much attention from mummy big boobs, he was feeling a sense of loneliness as mum was spending most of her time taking care of baby laju. What annoyed daddy the most was that mum would no longer allow him suck boobs coz because they were now meant for the baby. On the other hand, mummy was enjoying this experience because she could get the feel of newer, fresher lips on her nipples; it was like she had a new partner. This went on for a while and daddy decided he needed to seek vengeance.

He said since he couldn’t convince mum to change he was going to teach his new boobs competitor a lesson. He planned that when baby Laju was not sucking he would beat the hell out of him anytime he messed up slightly; if he missed an answer in a quiz or he doesn’t go to bed when it’s his bedtime and wouldn’t have a casual discussion with him. Mummy after hearing of this plan set out to protect her new lover. She knew she had to stay very close to him so she encouraged daddy to get a good paying job while she stays at home and enjoy the company of her new found love.

Very funny and idiotic but this is the reason why fathers are very harsh and mothers are very caring and also why fathers are the bread winners of the home and mothers are the caretakers, your father is mad you have taken over his lover while your mum is still in love with you. Lmao……………………..

He will be back to reclaim what originally belonged to him.

By Ehis Okpamen (aka e-b@llz but my friends call moi the commando)