I HATE YOKO ONO(S)

The Beatles are perhaps the most successful and talented rock band to have ever graced our world. They did not only offer such pioneering and revolutionary music but they brought true art into music and lyricism. Their album Sgt. Pepper and the Lonely Hearts Club Band was for most of the world, the beginning of the stimulation of immense artistic creativity coupled with music. After the Beatles, artists were forced to also integrate art into music or else they would not survive in the music business. The Beatles left the world a standard that is being followed nearly fifty years after their breakup, after being active a mere ten years.

All this greatness, artistic genius and legendary music, was destroyed by a bitch called Yoko Ono.

Bitch.

Have you ever thought that if perhaps Yoko Ono had not entered John Lennon’s life, there might not have been squabbles between he and Paul McCartney, and the Beatles would not have broken up so soon? Furthermore, if they had not broken up, George Harrison might not have gone all those fucked up places he went and contracted cancer. And might not have died. John Lennon might not have written Imagine, and he might not have been stabbed to death for it. The Beatles would still be together, and their members still alive, if it wasn’t for our dear Yoko Ono.

Bitch.

But of course I must concede that if Yoko Ono did not enter John Lennon’s life, he might have never written Imagine, he might have never become an antiwar activist (which was for a good cause), and he definitely would never have fathered his son Sean (who has a right like any other child, to live). Most importantly, he might have never been happy. All these things Yoko Ono brought into his life.

But she is still a bitch. And I try to say this with the best intentions that I can gather.

If you asked John Lennon (before he died), I’m sure he would tell you a great many good things about Yoko Ono and all the good things that she had brought into his life. As I have mentioned above, she did many good things for him and as a result, also for us, John Lennon’s audience.

But why the fuck couldn’t she leave it at that? John Lennon could still have written Imagine if he was with the Beatles. He could still have been an antiwar activist; in fact the other band members supported this cause. He could still have fucked her until his John Sperm Lennons reached her Yoko Ovum Ono and conceived Sean. So what the fuck is her problem? Why did she have to fuck all that greatness that came before her? She didn’t need to fuck up a good thing to create another good thing. She didn’t have to.

But that was the problem. She wasn’t a part of all that past, and if I might add, sustainable glory, and that was why she fucked it up. She did it because when John Lennon went on the road with the Beatles and did all that Beatles shit, it wasn’t all about Yoko Ono. So she fucked it up. Ended it. Removed the stumbling block. Killed George Harrison and ironically, John Lennon in the process.

A quote from the bitch about the Beatles’ split (and I was pleasantly surprised to find this, because it renewed my hate and multiplied it a thousand fold): “I felt the weight of the break-up because he had been communicating and having an extremely intense and intelligent exchange with three very intelligent...guys and now he expected all that to be replaced by me.”

Why wouldn’t you, bitch? Didn’t you enjoy the attention and the high pedestal in his life that he placed you? Wasn’t replacing those “three very intelligent...guys” your mission, bitch?

Don’t answer; all are rhetorical questions.

When two people are in love, in lust, or romantically attached to another, it generates, if you will allow me neologism, side-feelings. Especially jealousy; which is closely tied with hurt, neglect, and the need for attention. Let me explain and put it in modern terms so that you might understand. Many people have complained of this to me so I will use it. Your send your boyfriend or girlfriend a text message and they don’t reply for a long while, or reply at all. Not knowing why, you assume, aided with the “love” factor, the worst. Oh, he/she doesn’t care about me. Or he/she is out with their friends again and has forgotten about me. Or he/she is fucking someone else. Or he/she likes someone else now. Blah blah blah. You assume all these things because you are in love, or in lust, or romantically attached to another.

But all these things are not always so. The individual probably misplaced his/her phone, was sleeping or had something important to do. Innocent shit like that. I will however add that although they are not always so, they are usually so. My point here though is that because of the “love” factor, you do not give the other individual the benefit of the doubt.

You want the person to do what you want. You want them to be your own. You assume because they are involved with you, they must devote themselves totally to you. Everything that they do must be to please you. Every action must be in your honor.

I do not criticize these feelings. It is what every human being craves. When they are romantically attached this is what they expect from their other in the false and blissful aura of infatuation. It is not wrong. It is what makes us feel loved.

Where I begin to draw the line is where you think that if any action taken by the other is not in your honor, then it must be against you. No, no, no. They also have their own lives to live. When two people understand this, then they have become mature and have left the insecurities and perhaps the greater degree of bliss that is offered by puppy love.

People with romantic attachments feel these things and it is natural for them to want to avoid dealing with it. They don’t want the situation to degenerate into one in which, following from the example above, their other does not reply their text message promptly. They don’t want to have to think those ugly jealous thoughts that are sure to come. So they proceed to remove what they perceive as the causes for this, again following from the example, delay of the text message.

This is what Yoko Ono did. That is why the Beatles do not exist any longer. Instead we have the, compared to the Beatles’ music, substandard, and crappy music of Sir Paul McCartney. No offense.

There have been many Yoko Onos in human history. Anne Boleyn for instance who destroyed a holy thing. Cleopatra, who destroyed a great thing. Patricia Anne Boyd who nearly destroyed a friendship. And of course Yoko Ono who destroyed a beautiful, Beatleful thing. Most of them are women and that is why I have decided to symbolize them using Yoko Ono.

You know that girl that says she doesn’t like your friend? Or she thinks you should stop doing this or that? Or stop seeing a certain person. Or stop wearing certain things. Stop doing things the way you’ve been doing them. It’s all so she can have you to herself and fuck anybody that gets in the way. She is a Yoko Ono.

I’m not saying that every time your girlfriend says that you should stop seeing that person or stop doing that thing that you like, she is doing it for her own gain. Sometimes her demands are justifiable and even for your own good. But you have to examine it and judge for yourself. And a fair, without-the-love-factor judgement should be made. Because if it is not fair then you are also a Yoko Ono.

I’m also not saying that all who Yoko-Ono (when I asked for your permission for neologism earlier, it was just a formality. You know I don’t give a fuck) are women. I am not sexist. Men also do this. Fuck with the woman’s life to preserve his ego and battle his inner demons of jealousy that he feels in his chauvinism, he should not be having. But most of them are women and that is why I have chosen Yoko Ono.

Also, I hate her by default because I love the Beatles.

And why are most of them women? It is the power of pussy, my friends. I mean no disrespect toward women, but “pussy” is just the best way to symbolize it. When I say pussy, I do not mean the vagina alone. Work your way up from the vagina to the heart and the brain (and mind). Men are vulnerable to women who give them their vaginas, hearts and brains (and minds). As men are logical beings, they also give their penises, hearts, and brains (and minds) to such women. Most women desire a compassionate man, in other words, a sucker. And all men have to show some semblance of weakness to please such women (all women). And that is why it is mostly men who are susceptible to this Yoko Ono-ness. Women are not nearly as vulnerable as men in romantic attachments because men do not require them to be anything but themselves – emotional, caring and loving, and having a vagina.

This, added to the fact that women have easy substitutions for penises (such as dildos and other penises), is why women have all the power. In economic terms, the scarcest resource is the most expensive. This is why women are treated with such reverence; because it is not easy to find a substitute for the vagina, and women know this.

By the way, God bless all those women that give up their vaginas without fuss; or for money. You shall inherit the earth J.

This is why women have such a hold on men; and why most Yoko Onos are women. Because with their pussy-power comes the power to influence men into relinquishing those things that they found that they liked before they met the women. A very good example is when your male friends ask you where you’ve been, and you and they very well know that it has been pussy that has been keeping you away from them.

Men can’t really make women do the shit that they want; they need that pussy. Please don’t take offence; I have already described my version of pussy above.

However, we must realize that some Yoko Onos go about Yoko Onoing blindly. They love this guy so much and they blindly, under the influence of the ‘love factor’ destroy everything that came before. They are too deeply attached to see what destructive work they are doing and when they realize this, they stop, are apologetic, and try to rectify the damage that they have done.

Some do it on purpose. To keep the love of the other (admirable) and sometimes along with it, his cock and bank account.

It matters not. I hate all Yoko Onos. Knowingly or not, they destroy beautiful things. Such as the Beatles.

Who knows if Yoko Ono did this on purpose? All the alleged whisperings in John Lennon’s ears against Paul McCartney could have been in blind love. But she still destroyed the Beatles. Knowingly or not. For that, she is a motherfucking bitch; for taking away a good 500 potential songs that could have had “The Beatles” by the side of them in my Windows Media Player.

Bitch.